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Being a man comes with a lot of expectations. Especially in a relationship, I feel that there is never going to be an equal balance for anybody.
But a man needs to give, no matter how unreasonable or dismissive their partners are.
"I am unreasonable sometimes but its up to you to deal with me and make me feel better"
"If I'm mad at you I still expect you to stay and support me"
"My words may hurt you but you have be calm and sit through it"
While these might not be the exact words being said to me. It sure as hell feels like it.
Why does a man have to give so much? This is something that is heavily romanticized that a man is expected to give their partner everything no matter what because that is what "love" is.
But what about myself?
It just feels wrong sometimes.
However, I understand where the expectations come from therefore I give my all.
I swallowed my pride in the name of love and suddenly when I ask for some time to myself,
I am dismissed.
All I wanted was a day's rest and suddenly I am the problem.
They take offense to it because your sickness means you are not spending time with them.
Man, I'm so tried.
What else can I do, its like I'm treading through landmines right now. Not allowed to be a single mistake, not a moment's rest, my breath is always held, and I don't know how long before I fall on the fields.
There is so much expectation for me that I am scared. I wish I could give it all and be happy.
But I no longer feel fulfilled.
But a man needs to give, no matter how unreasonable or dismissive their partners are.
"I am unreasonable sometimes but its up to you to deal with me and make me feel better"
"If I'm mad at you I still expect you to stay and support me"
"My words may hurt you but you have be calm and sit through it"
While these might not be the exact words being said to me. It sure as hell feels like it.
Why does a man have to give so much? This is something that is heavily romanticized that a man is expected to give their partner everything no matter what because that is what "love" is.
But what about myself?
It just feels wrong sometimes.
However, I understand where the expectations come from therefore I give my all.
I swallowed my pride in the name of love and suddenly when I ask for some time to myself,
I am dismissed.
All I wanted was a day's rest and suddenly I am the problem.
They take offense to it because your sickness means you are not spending time with them.
Man, I'm so tried.
What else can I do, its like I'm treading through landmines right now. Not allowed to be a single mistake, not a moment's rest, my breath is always held, and I don't know how long before I fall on the fields.
There is so much expectation for me that I am scared. I wish I could give it all and be happy.
But I no longer feel fulfilled.
